Sometimes I look back on certain events; or maybe a series of events and get angry. I think “how could I have done that!” or.. “What an idiot I was”. Then I can’t let myself get too angry because I realize that those events shaped my personality. If they were shitty things that happened–I’ve learned from them. To say this would make me seem intelligent and “noble”. Little things along the way add up. I think that’s why old people are considered “wise”. Except they get so old they usually start to forget, or simply don’t have the desire to give a rat’s behind. One part of life that perplexes me is the “succeed” part. How do you know when you’re there? So many goals, wishes, wants  that by the time you’ve accomplished 3 or 4 things you’re already working toward another 10. I don’t see this as something negative but I have a strange feeling that’s why some people are just never happy no matter what they have. I would tell anyone there are 3-4 factors that contribute greatly to one’s happiness:

1. Physical and emoitonal health/stability

2. Social Stability (friends and family support)

3. Financial stability ($$$$$$$$)

These may not be everyone’s top 3 but they are certainly mine. If I have all 3 of these things it seems the rest is whipped cream and cherries (well, minus cherries since I hate them).

I think it’s easy to lose track of what the basics are to make you happy. If you’re feeling down or depressed, take a look at all the things you DO have. If you want more, go get them. Don’t complain.

I’m not interested in being a teacher yet. I think I’ll be a perpetual student until I pax out.

…but not even one ring to the doorbell and it’s already 6:55pm. Of course at first I dreaded the thought of opening the door every 5 minutes, but I didn’t think it’d be this childless. :0

I watched an interesting documentary called “Food Matters”. There were a few odd facts thrown in that I hadn’t heard about. Such as the 51% rule (51% or more of your meal should be fresh). Apparently, eating over 51% cooked foods triggers white blood cells to produce and treat the organic molecules as intruders. Nutrition is such a new science- I’m never really surprised.

I just killed a spider. You know I hate them. Oh- thanks toothpastefordinner.

http://www.toothpastefordinner.com/102010/in-bed.gif

-Pax

I’m really tired of listening to people complain about the economy and moan about how hard it is to find a job. I’m not going to put myself down, but I know that there are plenty of qualified indivuals out there who are lazy and have been blaming the economy for their misfortunes. Enough with the economic woes, and more with the DOING something about it. What peeves me to the max is when people say that I’m lucky- a lucky young woman who’s “come across” a good job and a plan for a career. Yes, it must have been luck. Or it could have been hard work and a little motivation that got me there. For you who read this, most likely you know someone in this situation, In fact- it may even be yourself. If that’s the case, denial is a step above idiocy. Scratch that. They’re about the same in terms of results.

This week of training has been great, although I’m tired every day and pretty much want to come home and die. I love learning about all the products and competitors. There are going to be a lot of challenges with this job but according to my trainer I’m ‘ahead of the curve’ so I take that compliment and run with it.

I’m looking forward to being home tomorrow. Business planning with my trainer will be fun, we are going out to lunch at a nice mexican place he knows of in the area so that’s something to look forward to. Then I get to have a nice meal made by my little Rider at night so all in all- my birthday will be one for the records

I was 30 seconds too short on my verbal presentation today. Apparently, my professor had put up a sign indicating this to me on the back of a piece of paper, written in light pencil. Well, apparently points were deducted for committing said crime. Fortunately for me, I will be getting over that within the next.. oh wait, since I just blogged about it NOW I FEEL FANTASTIC. I FEEL FREE OF ANY RESIDUAL PAIN AND AGONY. (lawls-o-meter 9). I really like vlogging but I find I only like to do this with my friends via private messages. Not really for Joe Bob and Randy Smith to enjoy, if you catch my drift.

Also, I’d like to point out my fascination with Zinc. Whenever I feel a cold coming on, I pop one of these bad boys and the next day I feel better/ It’s possible that half this is mental, I really couldn’t tell you though. Scientifically, anyway. Stop. I CANT. IM A BUSINESS MAJOR. Which brings me to my other two rants. The first one begins with being pigeon holed into a job based solely on your major. What is that about? I know that Nielsen basically told me since I was X major, I could go into X role. I said that I was flexible and the rep said “Oh, well we place people based on their majors!” I said “Oh, that’s too bad you are restricting people based on an education that 90% of the shit you learned won’t actually be used. In fact, they’ll train you the way they want to. Yeah, she didn’t really know what to say and honestly, I probably shouldn’t have gotten upset at her. Shes just the rep. She didnt make the rules. She follows them. My other rant is about a great story I heard on NPR while driving to the gym/grocery store the other day. Some Dr. said that the quickest and easiest way to judge a person is to see how they react to good news…that’s happening to you. For instance, you get a promotion. You tell Mary. Mary says “cool” and has no further inquiries. Now take Kevin who says “Oh my God, that is fantabulous!” and asks all sorts of questions. You know, I have found this to be SO true. I really like it and I’m going to start keeping track more often .

When I was on the plane coming back from a trip to California, I sat next to the father of the son who created T Shirt Hell. He said something that really resonated. “If you want to make a decision and you’re stuck between options, ask yourself this: ‘Do you feel light, or heavy?’ about it? Does it make you feel good and light taking that option?” You can see where he was going with that. It’s a quick rule that I’ve applied a TON of times since he unleashed his fatherly wisdom all over me in the aisle seat of United Air.

“If you were dating a woman and she became terminally ill, would you be cheating on her if you didn’t want to stay, but did because it was thought to be the ‘right’ thing to do?”

This challenges our ‘societal norms and values’ and places the self as having equivalent importance as the other person. If we lie to ourselves and lie to a loved one, is that not just as bad as breaking it off? Should we, in fact, be the saviors of others when the act of saving is merely an act?

Take the following to be true: A man has been dating his girlfriend for 5 years and suddenly, his girlfriend is diagnosed with a life ending disease. But it’s slow progression to the grave. He, after another 5 years, begins to wander. The sex has left the relationship and he has wandered to another woman. Yet every night he is with his girlfriend, helping her and proclaiming his love. Is it better for her to die unbeknownst of his infidelity (ignorance is bliss?) OR would it have been better if he was honest, said “Peace out” and moved on?

Savage discusses the implications this woman would face, hypothetically in both situations. What I found particularly harsh was the man who, while at the hospital when his wife found out she had cancer, slipped divorce papers over to her in the hospital bed. How he was prepared for this is beyond me — but I am pretty sure we can safely classify this guy as a cad. There aren’t any road maps, bubble charts or directional signs to guide us on the pathway to good morals and ethics, unless you’re obliged to follow some type of corporate code (which for the followers, take Enron, enough said).

If I had been diagnosed with something horribly debilitating, I would certainly want my loved one to be by my side. But after all, that is assuming he would WANT to be, and I would never want to sacrifice someone’s emotional stability/happiness in order to fabricate some of my own.

My take on the Savage question is simply that-mine. But the real point here is to get you to think about what being “moral” and “faithful” really means, especially if you aren’t being just that to yourself.

...what?

Let’s not pretend like we care about the health of New Yorkers.  I get angry every time I hear/see the ad that’s been running in support of the tax. Even if the TV’s on mute it makes me cringe. A doctor blabs about how New Yorkers are doomed health wise. Obesity, cholesterol, whatever. In short, we’re fat pigs and we’re killing ourselves. Then the ad give us all these great reasons for the tax on Soda. First, it’s mentioned that we need to keep New York healthy.

What?

We have rising heart disease cases, people with BMI’s well over 30 and this is all going to be fixed by a tax on soda, oh kiddies surely you jest.

There is one thing in this ad that’s right though. Putting some of that money toward health care is a positive thing. Just don’t tell us that it’s going to make New York healthier, HELLO! Think cigarettes. I haven’t done any polling but I’d assume if you asked the majority of New Yorkers whether the Soda Tax is effective for the purpose of “Making New York Healthy” I’m willing to bet about 75% would say no. There have been similar polls conducted about cigarettes and the taxes incurred… people know it’s not going to stop those who are addicted. And guess what? If obese Kim and morbidly obese Mike go out to pick up a bottle of Dr. Pepper at Cumby’s, see the price is slightly higher… Gee, I bet they’ll go through this exact dialogue:

Mike: Oh Kim, look, it seems as if the price of Dr. Pepper has gone up by about 60 cents!

Kim: Mike, that’s because New York cares about you! They know that you are suffering this epidemic and this is their way to show you they care! Or to at least be AN EFFECTIVE DETERRENT

Mike: Mm, Dr. Pepper

Kim: Oh, grab me one too?

The additional $X Kim and Mike spend in this hypothetical but potentially true situation in no means influence they’re decision. And maybe, for a few people out there it will. But guess who those people are? The people with very low socioeconomic statuses. So low that they literally could not find the extra few coins on the street.

But then again, we’re brought back to reality. NYC OTB is under serious financial pressures and there’s a possibility it may close by the end of the month due to bankruptcy. Clearly, there has to be a change of strategy for NYRA and if this doesn’t happen efficiently and effectively, it may just be a reality that the Travers Day Race will be a thing of the past- at least for this year.

Caught ya!

Okay, so I happened to decide after reading quite extensively about various leadership theories and styles that I particularly hate the theory x and theory y ways of implementing leadership. Just as a general definition, theory x assumes people are lazy and do not want to work, while theory y assumes that people are generally hard workers and will work to their fullest even without pressures from superiors.  Each situation is a PRODUCT of the environment in which one works. Honestly, I have to think about being less of superior and more of the drone for this instance. If my boss is implementing a “theory y” in which there are no quotas, monitoring systems, check ups, sign in and outs, I am going to feel as if it doesn’t matter. As if I do not matter. If I do not matter, it is actually SMARTER to not waste your resources and energy on something pointless. Now, if this theory Y is implemented and there is recognition of your work, someone says hi to you and cares what you are working on, (not being all draconian) then depending on the type of person, it motivates one to want to perform well and continue to receive positive feedback. For those people who do NOT, quite simply they are using the system to their advantage — if their main goal is NOT to do any work. Maybe they will eventually get fired, or maybe they will work for the state and clock in at 9am and leave at 3pm accomplishing well, not much (not that I’m generalizing, I figured once the guy who made 90K a year spoke out to the media though about how he did nothing all day called for a reference). I find nothing wrong with this, at all. In fact, I certainly see no reason if a company is wasting their resources they shouldn’t have to face the consequences. But that does NOT mean I am in support of theory X, either. Theory X is filled with distrust for employees and every step of the process from hire to fire and in between is monitored, checked up on, and evaluated by superiors. What is wrong with this? In the theory it certainly can have the potential to border on unethical behavior (for instance, shutting the blinds on workers, only allowing them certain breaks regardless of state mandates, etc). This HAS happened, especially in smaller private companies. But poor working conditions are hard to judge and there’s a fine line between purely unethical behavior and control.

It only seems natural to want to control every aspect of those working for you. Make sure they’re working! No waste! However didn’t elementary school teach us anything? I learned that you need to give respect to get it back. You can’t be a good leader if your teammates do not share your goals and want to strive to achieve them with you! Sadly, many leaders do not understand this. But there’s causality behind it too.. at times, people do not deserve the benefit of the doubt, the chance to prove themselves. But why should everyone be punished for the few lazy people out there? Our society generally is hard working. There are many people in ghettos, slums, and other places who work hard every day. They may not be in a position to just “go get a better job.” Maybe they’re watching their children at home, working two part time jobs, etc. But people do what they can to survive. And we have a lot of options as humans. So if you’re going to be a jerk as a leader, don’t expect to have an easy time. Some people would rather say goodbye and choose another option, even if it’s destitution. So what? who cares about those people, there are plenty of people who just need money to feed themselves and wont care? Well, sure, when your entire workforce is made up of these people good luck getting them to help you achieve goals and objectives. In fact, many find themselves instilling yet more rules and demands. That’s the difference between a place like Wegmans and one of their competitors. People love Wegmans, not only their customers but their employees too. Wegmans offers numerous benefits such as tuition help, vacation time, and the highest wages … even for the lowest of jobs. The atmosphere isn’t dark, dreary and horrible. In fact it’s quite pleasant, and the feeling is in the air. With almost 80 stores and revenue of over 4 million, they have been ranked numerous times as Forbes best companies to work for. It’s a lot to do with Danny Wegman, and a lot to do with how they value their employees. In other words, theory x and y are just names given to two styles so opposite on the continuum that IRL, it usually doesnt occur this way. Instead of labeling theories, we should just dig to the bottom and find out what works, what doesn’t, and how to implement the best strategy for leadership to achieve profitability and deliver the best value.